I suck at this blogging thing... and New Year's Resolution # 1

So, I really am really, really bad at this. I started this blog in 2004 when I was pregnant with my youngest child, my son, who is now a whopping 14 years old. I had so many hopes and dreams for writing about my life, what I am passionate about, picking apart so many topics and maybe sharing a perspective of life that others might not have thought about.

And how many posts have I actually made? The breakdown is dismal.
2004: 4
2005: 0
2006: 1
2007: 1
2008: 4
2009: 0
2010: 0
2011: 0
2012: 0
2013: 9
2014: 2
2015: 0
2016: 0
2017: 0
2018: 0
2019: 1, this one.

Not a single year did I break into double digits. So really, why bother writing this one? Why bother continuing to attempt blogging? I mean really. What is the point?

Because this year I made two New Year's Resolutions. I haven't made resolutions for New Year's in well over a decade. I know my level of follow through. It's non-existent to be honest. But I resolved to blog more and game more. More on the gaming thing some other time.

The views I've had for my various blogs over the years have never been anything to sneeze at, so why continue? Is the method of blogging what is stopping me? Am I choosing lesser platforms for my blog? Should I just use Facebook? Move to a new platform? Consolidate my blogs? Start fresh? What do I do?

And it doesn't help that I have too many passions. I am a Jane of All Trades, Master of None, which basically means that I like too many things and I'm not good enough at or well versed enough in any one thing. There's no way people will flock to my site and find me interesting. My Pinterest boards haven't a core theme. They are quite literally all over the place in interests. Games and their platforms are all fair game, pun intended. My favorite crafts run the gambit from wood crafts, to painting, to drawing, to sewing, to needlepoint, to movies, books, television... You see the problem.

Facebook allows me to post and share anything I come across, but it's hard to sit and write a long post on Facebook. No one wants to read it. Then, if I post something extra long, my husband isn't exactly supportive, as he says "I see you wrote another novel," in a completely condescending tone. As much as I love him, he barely knows what a good novel is unless it's written by Stephen King, and books are a 'waste of space' because you 'only read them once'. I bought him a hardcover Doctor Sleep a few years ago and I don't think he's even cracked it open. So I fear writing more than 4 sentences on Facebook because if I do, I'm going to hear his disdain. But utilizing Facebook in some way, shape or form is how I'm going to share my words to people I care about. So there's juggling that.

The current attention span of the masses is so incredibly short. If they are not entertained within the first minute or so, you've lost them already and they click away. Reading on an electronic is 'oh so difficult', and most prefer their stimulus in video format. Hey, that is not happening from me. As much as I fantasize about vlogging rather than blogging... Yeah. I am not prepared to do that. Even though I have plans to use a room screen my uncle made with some curtains I bought as a backdrop... It's all someday and a someday a long way off.

And if you've made it all the way to this point in my post, you see how much I jumped around on the topic. The downside to having my level of ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder for those who have been living under a rock the past 2 decades), is that my brain runs tangential. Anything can spark a topic and within that topic a word or phrase or background noise while I type can cause some other topic to enter the writing.

And if I just press "Post" or "Publish" without editing, I sound like a rambling fool. If I take time to edit, I get bogged down in the process, giving anything else the opportunity to pull me away from the edits. Before you know it, I have drafts that never get published.

Oy. What to do? So here's why the Resolution to Blog More: I need to share. Hold on. I'm pulling away for a minute to watch Jada Pinkett Smith on Live with Kelly and Ryan. Be Back Momentarily...

~^..^~

Okay. There's a commercial break... Do you see what I'm talking about? How can I even hope to be a successful blogger?

Perhaps the point is to just get things off my chest and out into the universe. If I put it out there, my intention is not to earn money this way. I'm far too busy working and recovering from work daily to invest time even learning how to make money blogging. But perhaps something I say and post will help someone later.

Okay. Jada's back on. BRB

~^..^~

All right, her segment is over so I'm back. And her appearance on the show is actually my point. She just finished saying that we're all in this together. We are all living this life and if we survived something or did something, we should share it. It might help someone else. And you know what? That's exactly why I have to keep trying to blog.

Christmas morning I was at the in-laws' Christmas. For the past 9 years, we go to my mother-in-law's house for Christmas with my husband's immediate family. I wasn't feeling well, having come down with a flu-like bug the night before at 11:30. Ish. So that I didn't even remotely risk anyone else getting anything from me, I sat in the corner of the couch and messed with my new phone. I saw an ad for Jada's Red Table Talk and proceeded to watch the first five episodes. Jada and Will Smith are like realer than real to me, you know? Their lives and experiences are not typical, but if you know anything about them, where they came from, how they chose to raise their children, how they interact with the public, you know that they seem just a little too good to be true.

And that's why I think Jada's show with her mother and her daughter is so very important. Our society today cannot seem to take anything real at face value, but anything shocking is believable even when it is not. Jada's first two topics, Motherhood and Surviving Loss, were so real for me. Then it went on to Body Confessions, getting real with Gabrielle Union, and how she raised Jaden and Willow and how it affected them. Despite all the controversy surround the youngest two Smith children, as 'out there' as you may think them to be, they are amazing kids if you truly listen to them.

So what's the point again? If you've made it this far, I think you get it. We all want a voice. We all want to be heard. None of us want to feel inconsequential. We want to matter. And so many get into trouble when they find something that makes them feel important, especially when it gets them on the wrong side of the law or in bad situations.

Sharing how I've lived my life, what is meaningful to me, sharing my opinions on entertainment for its own value, and while I'm at it, attempting to not delve into gossip, that's my point.

I promise to attempt a better rapport. And at first, I'm quite sure I won't have feedback or much of an audience. Doesn't mean I'm going to give up this time.

The blog may change looks. Maybe it will stay the same. Maybe it will get a new name. Maybe it will stay 'her royal pinkness'. I mean it is kinda out there. Just like me.

Uncut. Unedited. Uncensored. Okay. Barely edited. But I'm not going back through and reading and critiquing the heck out of it. That will distract me from the purpose and I'll drown in the drafts.

TTFN